Tuesday, January 09, 2007

And I Don't Feel Any Different

17.12 On Time
"Whatever's the matter?" Lovely asked me. "You look as if you're trapped in a burning building and you've got to choose between two doors and only one door leads to safety"
(most people would've been content with "...like you've seen a ghost" but this is Lovely we're talking about)

What 'it' is, is a scent, releasing a memory that I almost caught, but which has now, elusively, vanished.

I can't identify the scent, I can't recall the memory, but the back of my neck is hot and cold, my mouth dry. It's a freeze frame of fear - then it's over, drained away. The scent and the memory.
I laugh it off.

On the train I'm starting to doze. Drifting. Lulled by the motion until I'm jolted back - that scent again, that memory again, that fear again.

I don't know what it is I'm so scared of, but it's very close by.

The New Year - Death Cab For Cutie
Get Me Away From Here I'm Dying - Belle & Sebastian
Let Me Be - Kate Rusby
Everything I Own - Bread
The Black Amnesias - Hope Of The States
Arc Of Time - Bright Eyes
If The Stars Shine Tonight - The Lilac Time
When The Stars Go Blue - Ryan Adams
Time Has Told Me - Nick Drake

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