Thursday, October 18, 2007

Do I Disappoint You?

8.10 On Time
Disappoint? In the flesh? Oh no Rufus. Never.

About fifteen minutes into the main event, having already tried a 'hard stare', I lean over, attract the attention of the couple at the end of the row, and ask (reasonably enough I think) if they could possibly keep the noise down.

"Why? What’s it to you?"
"I can hear you."
"I didn’t pay to come and listen to you chatting"

I am nonplussed. I really didn't think this through did I?
"...what are you going to do about it…"
I am completely thrown by this. I made the mistake of thinking he was just stupid. I didn’t allow for the fact that he might be a dick.
"…get me evicted?"

Luckily, being a complete dick he has provided me with the solution.

I clamber across him and his equally charmless companion and have a chat with a rather large man from security. The rather large man has a chat with Dick. The rather large man reports back. Any more trouble from them and they're out. The down side, of course, is that I now have to clamber back over Mr & Mrs Dick to get into my seat. They don't give an inch; but when the lights come up for the interval I notice that I have managed to leave a footprint on his thigh.

During the interval the ladies in the row behind say "Thank You". Apparently they were on the point of braining him.

It is at about this point that I manage to stop shaking.

Realease The Stars - Rufus Wainwright


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