Monday, July 31, 2006

...there's never gonna be a 'moment of truth' for you

17.12 On Time
There’s one man who’s half a world away, and another one who's wishing he was.
A third remains content with what he’s got, but I worry that it’s only a matter of time.

To Wish Impossible Things – The Cure
Half A World Away – Oasis
Leaving Today – The Divine Comedy
Ticket To Ride – The Beatles
Daydream Believer – The Monkees
Don’t Come The Cowboy With Me Sunny Jim – Kirsty MacColl
Baker Street – Gerry Rafferty
Learn To Live With What You Are – Ben Folds

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8.10 On Time
Found myself on the mailing list for this, from HeadHoncho:

"Thank you for expressing an interest (or at least the possibility!) in co-operating in "Worlds Cheapest TV Moments". I still feel this project has the potential to showcase our services and I am sure we can give a good account of ourselves.
If you are in a position to encourage colleagues to participate, please take the opportunity to do so as it will give us a wider pool of potential activities for them to consider filming."

The list splits neatly into two camps - shameless self promoters and troublemakers.
Now I'm a bit frightened.


Although his tentative use of the word "still" is encouraging.

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Friday, July 28, 2006

7.31 On Time
The grapevine tells me that Perfect has got himself promoted and been made a J2O - at least I think that's what Charlie said.

Anyway, it's a very commendable achievement and furthers my belief that it can be only a matter of months before he takes over the running of things in that People's Republic between the Warrington/Runcorn corridor and the Irish Sea entirely. For the benefit of all concerned.

2008 looks like a good year.

You And The Clouds Will Still Be Beautiful - XTC
ABC - The Pipettes

Edward - James Yorkston and the Athletes
The Delivery Man - Elvis Costello
Pain Killer - Turin Brakes

Marvelous - The Lightning Seeds
Legal Man - Belle & Sebastian
In The End - Linkin Park
The View - Modest Mouse

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Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Oh, Romeo? Yeah, you know I used to have a scene with him...

8.10 On Time
I've been in touch with someone I used to know a long time ago.
In fact, I've been in touch with a couple of people I used to know a long time ago.

It's fascinating and curious and a little bit like the start of a novel that someone else will one day write, at which point I'll wail: "...but that was MY idea".

The fly in the ointment is my Friends Reunited profile.


I thought it was an obvious fabrication.
I thought I was being mischievous and mysterious.
Simultaneously revealing and concealing.
Honest but not truthful.

There is a possibility that they both believe it.

Email is a marvelous thing, although there is a quote from Jpod which I am keeping very much in mind:

"I think computers ought to have a key called "I'm Drunk" and when you push it, it prevents you from sending email for twelve hours"

Romeo & Juliet - Dire Straits
Tiny Vessels - Death Cab For Cutie
A Lady Of a Certain Age - The Divine Comedy
An Imagined Affair - Elbow
Moon Shadow - Kate Rusby
I Close My Eyes And Count To Ten - Dusty Springfield
On The Beach - Kirsty MacColl
I Love You - The Pipettes

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Monday, July 24, 2006

17.12 On Time
"Tickets, passes and excuses please!"
My Favourite Conductor has a new catchphrase.

He also has a broken chip & pin machine and I have no cash.
The free train is the sweetest train.

Walking Wounded - Everything But The Girl

Friday, July 21, 2006

...and I'm never going back to my old school

Not any more I'm not.

Because It's Not Love (but it's still a feeling)

17.12 On Time
Had a fantastic day at work today.

My job is fulfilling and stimulating.
I make the world a better place on a daily basis.
LineManager is a star, without a doubt the most supportive and fair-minded person one could wish to work alongside. My colleagues are, without exception, as fine and fragrant a bunch of people as you could ever meet and a delight to spend time with. Senior Management, from HeadHoncho down, is competent and efficient and values its staff beyond pearls.

I'm so lucky to work for such an outstanding Four Star Service*.

I even dreamt about work last night. That’s how dedicated I am.

I was calling a company on Anglesey, but the woman I needed to speak to would only speak in Welsh. She thought I would be thwarted by this tactic, but it didn’t bother me, because I knew Welsh speaking colleague would take the call for me...If I could only catch his eye.

It was all about hot tubs.


*the Audit Commission

We Are The Pipettes - The Pipettes

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Thursday, July 20, 2006

17.12 On Time
A funny thing.
As of today, I find I can no longer access petite anglaise from work.

Am I being saved from myself?


We Are The Pipettes – The Pipettes
(like sherbet lemon for your ears - thanks joe!)


Wednesday, July 19, 2006

8.10 On Time
Since I finished 'Jpod' I’ve not been reading.
Since I’ve not been reading, I’ve not been sleeping.
Since I’ve not been sleeping, I’ve ... not been in the greatest form.

Last night I scanned the shelves and rediscovered someone who’s just about perfect for this weather.

This morning I woke up feeling almost human.

It Might As Well Rain Until September – Carole King
Never Mind – Nanci Griffith
Missing – Everything But The Girl
Hallelujah – Prefab Sprout
Into Temptation – Crowded House
Neil Jung – Teenage Fanclub
Tilly & The Wall - Reckless

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

The clouds were afraid...one-ten in the shade..and the pavement was steaming

17.12 Thirty Minutes Late
It’s the hottest day of the year.
The hottest day ever.
Hotter than Texas.
I’ve had a headache since 10.00.
And I’m sitting on a train that’s going nowhere.

All the way from 1973 Bobby Goldsboro sings: “... the sweat trickled down, the front of her gown, and I thought it would melt her...”

Everyone is melting.
But it’s not very alluring.

Summer The First Time - Bobby Goldsboro
(on a loop, in my head)

Friday, July 14, 2006

16.12 Five Minutes Late
Currently, pretty much all I can listen to is: The Shins (Chutes Too Narrow), Roddy Frame (Western Skies), Johnathan Rice (Trouble Is Real), Calexico (Garden Ruin) and Mushaboom by Feist.

On repeat. I can’t stop.

I need some new ideas. Or a new mood. Or come Monday I’m going to hate all of the above.

Help!

...a book that you read in reverse, so you understand less, as the pages turn

7.31 Twenty Minutes Late
Last year some time, during one of those 'Why do people do the things they do?' conversations, Leanne said something that I didn't understand.
About how people get to a certain age or stage in their lives where they look ahead and think:

'Nothing will ever change. This is me now, forever.'

Then they go a bit mad and either;
a) have an affair, or,
b) get married when they've been perfectly happily living together for years, or,
c) decide to have babies, or,
d) pack in their job and go off to find themselves in other countries.

At the time I didn't get it.

Then, while I was sitting under the cherry tree on a balmy evening with a glass of wine in my hand and my true love by my side I had an epiphany.


There is nothing wrong with my life.

What do I have dissatisfied with?
So, my job's a bit crappy, but we can still laugh about it.
What do I have to strive for?
The constant vigilance required to maintain an ideal Body Mass Index? Come on now, that's not a goal I want to own up to.

The hall floor still needs varnishing and the bathroom door could do with a coat of paint, and there will always be weeds to pull up, but what am I aiming for?
What are my dreams these days?

Then I knew what she meant.

First Thing - Four Tet
7/4 (Shoreline) - Broken Social Scene
Saint Simon - The Shins

Human Remains - Tom McRae
Salvage A Smile - Laura Veirs
Mushaboom - Feist
Days Go By - Dirty Vegas
Last Forever - Thirteen Senses
Destiny - Zero 7

Dry Land - Roddy Frame
Pink Bullets - The Shins

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Thursday, July 13, 2006

7.31 On Time
My favourite ever automated response, from a company whose products are of particular interest to... shall we say...the older gentleman’

Thank you for your email to Customer Services at the ‘Once We’ve Got You On Our Mailing List We’ll Never Leave You Alone’ Office.

We are currently experiencing very high volumes of query's both through
email and telephone lines.

Currently we are able to respond to our emails within 5 working days,
please allow us this time before re-sending.

I would like to assure you we are aware of the incontinence &
frustration this is causing our customers and we are taking urgent
measures to rectify the situation as quickly as possible.

Thank you for your patience in this matter.

Sincerely Yours,
Customer Service Manager”

LineManager authorised me to respond thus:

“Dear Customer Service Manager

Are you taking the piss?”

But I’m sure it’s already been done.

Chutes Too Narrow – The Shins

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

17.12 Seven Minutes Late
Volunteers are obviously thin on the ground.

Even the Usual Suspects are backward at coming forward.

HeadHoncho sent out another email today, stressing how vital our support was to the success of his ego trip the whole fly on the wall exercise. There were voting buttons and, this time, we all have to respond by Friday.

So, what's it to be? The "No, no way, not over my dead body, not ever" button, the "Memememe please! the telly! oh yes!!" button, or the "I'm not actually agreeing to support this potential fiasco, but neither am absolutely I ruling out the possibility that, in the right circumstances, it could be fun" cagey button.

Of course, what's really needed is a "What's it worth if I promise to be good?" option.

Trouble Is Real - Jonathan Rice

Friday, July 07, 2006

7.31 Five Minutes Late
BottomOfTheBarrel Productions want to make a TV series about the Service.

HeadHoncho, being a terrible show off and all round media whore, is dead keen.
His sidekick, DeputyMoleMan, is not really a people person. If he didn't work from home 90% of the time he would spend his days hiding under his desk or ducking into cupboards to avoid face to face communication with anyone (come to think of it, there's a good chance that's what he does even when he is at home) so we will assume he is probably less so.

Apparently this "represents an excellent development opportunity for officers" and we are assured that it won't be a 'stitch-up'.


Honest.

Volunteers are being sought.

Love Me Like You - Magic Numbers
Cecilia - Simon & Garfunkel
Another Pleasant Valley Sunday - The Monkees
Ventura Highway - America
Storms - Nanci Griffith
Sweet Adeline- Elliott Smith
Feeling Oblivion- Turin Brakes

Love Field - Elvis Costello

Thursday, July 06, 2006

17.12 Five Minutes Late
The other day Tim's mum (she is nearly 81 remember) informed him that I was a dead ringer for the one who'd just got knocked out of Wimbledon by Maria Sharapova.

Set me to thinking - when I was at college someone told me (at regular intervals) that I looked like Maddy Prior.

One of those assessments seems more realistic than the other.

Olsen Olsen - Sigur Ros
Hysteria - Muse
My Iron Lung - Radiohead
Whatever - Oasis
Black Math - The White Stripes
Music Is Math - Boards Of Canada

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7.31 On Time
I've invented an exciting new rule for the benefit of the World Cup of Soccer.

From the knock-out stages onwards the victorious team gets to select the player of their choice from the sad-sad losers to strengthen their premium squad.

Simple but effective, as it:

a) sustains interest levels of those spectators who only care about their own nationals*;
b) raises the stakes for the players, some of whom might just try a bit harder;
c) ensures that the poor old French don't have to go into the final worrying wtf Barthez is going to do next.

To be honest, it wasn't received with much enthusiasm in my own living room, but I think that's just down to a lack of vision. I'm sure Sepp will love it.

(*whether or not these people deserve pandering to is a separate issue.)


Chutes Too Narrow - The Shins

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

...you made a promise to trust the part of you that knew instinctively that what would be would be

7.31 Ten Minutes Late
New Neighbours have moved in.

(Into next-door, not into the flats where the ManWithTheWolf lives.)


These are the ones who knocked on the door and asked the Old Neighbours if they might feel like selling their house. And they decided they did. And now they’re moving to France to start a new life. Just like that.

I’m not jealous, because I don’t harbour any desire to live in France, but I envy their recklessness.
And I sort of wonder what would have happened if the Old Neighbours had been out and they'd knocked on our door instead.

Anyway, the new lot…

They seem to have a shiny red sports car in the garage and his & hers people carriers on the drive.
We’ll see.

Western Skies - Roddy Frame

Monday, July 03, 2006

...I see a wish when I look into your eyes

7.31 On Time
I've been back at work for a week now.
I've been giving it a fair chance.
I've been trying to find some spark, some reason to remain optimistic about our collective futures, but there's nothing. The knowledge that on Thursday, LineManager is probably going to try to persuade one of us to get het-up about mobile phone cash-backs, does nothing to inspire.

Being redeployed in my absence would almost have been a blessing - at least something would've happened.

At 7.00am I sat in the garden with a cup of tea and listened to the birds.
At 8.00am I stepped off the train with the sinking feeling that I'd already enjoyed the best part of my day.

Being currently obsessed with a song containing the lyrics "The road you'd chosen to follow slowed and turned into a cul-de-sac, there's no shame in turning back and trying something new" doesn't help either.

Oh, and I'd like a marxophone please.

Pink Bullets - The Shins
Acrobat - Johnathan Rice
Western Skies - Roddy Frame
Western Sky - American Music Club
Perfect - The Lightning Seeds
Middle School Frown - Josh Rouse
Cruel - Calexico
Marble Arch - Roddy Frame

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